Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
