what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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