Who did Billy Mays play for?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
You've changed since you got that strap on
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
