Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
