THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
