I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
