Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize