U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
