TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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