I wish I only lived at night.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
