I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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