AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
