we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I think your dad took our porno
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
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