I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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