therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize