god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
