She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
