You really coming over, don't trick.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
