they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
