He disabled his match.com account in front of me
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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