i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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