Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
