Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
