I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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