dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
