If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
