Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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