i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
