The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Randomize
