Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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