U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
