Why are handjobs necessary in class?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Randomize
