Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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