Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
