check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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