just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize