Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
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