I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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