whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
