You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
