I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
