He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
