i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
