This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
