they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
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