Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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