Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Hippo gnu deer
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize