i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
