come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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