I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
