Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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