I want to walk on stilts...naked
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
